No, I wasn’t smiling… To all those looking at my pictures thinking my life is all laughter, Colgate smiles and fun, here’s something I’d like you to know: quitting my #1 numbing practice (alcohol) has made me an EXPERT when it comes to sitting with ugly feelings.
At the beginning, I still had a couple of socially tolerated numbing practices that I resorted to in times of extreme need (Netflix binging, if you see what I mean!). But I slowly tried to get used just BEING with these emotions. And as you can guess, it sucked. BIG TIME. Cos yeah, sometimes it sucks to be there in this dark place, feeling heavy with pain, anger, resentment, fear, sadness, shame, guilt and whatnot. UGH. Why would someone choose to do that to themselves?
Well, I’ve learnt that sitting with the pain is only an intermediate step. A sucky one, yes, but one that leads to approaching and eventually processing the emotions. Yes. Processing and releasing. Ahh. FREEDOM. But yeah, before that, there’s the processing part, and processing is no fun.
Sorry to drop that bomb, but it’s true. Healing is not all flowery and sparkly. That’s AFTER the healing. The “during” part is more like working out. It’s like running and sweating, but knowing that even though your body might have preferred to be doing something else, like sitting on the couch, for example, the result is going to be worth it.
Today, I pay special attention to how I feel. And when things are not feeling good, I dig into my toolbox, and pull out one of the many tools I now have to deal with the various states of ickiness I might experience.
Sometimes, I don’t even know what’s going on. I just know that stuff needs to come out. That’s when I put my sneakers on, and go for a walk. And it works. All the times.
The day I took this picture, I didn’t have a 72-teethed smile to flash at you as I usually do. I had tears streaming down my face, but I still wanted to show up, and let you know that life is not always sparkles and flowers when you quit drinking, but that doesn’t mean that life isn’t awesome.
I love my life and I feel so grateful for the way it completely turned around the moment I said NO to alcohol, and YES to believing in myself and unleashing my potential. It didn’t happen overnight, and that’s exactly why I’ve made it my mission to facilitate the transformation for other women on this journey.
IF:
* You’ve quit your numbing practices (alcohol, food, drugs, sex, work, tv) and would like a healthier way to deal with challenges
* You’ve quit alcohol but it still feels like a struggle instead of the fantastic experience so many talk about
* You’ve quit drinking but don’t want to miss out on all the fun and/or lose your friends
* You’ve been alcohol-free for a while and you’re wondering: “Now what? There must be more to it than just counting the days since your last drink, right?!”
THEN:
LET’S TALK! In my course, BYOB – Be Your Own Booze, I teach women to reclaim their Inner Power and transform their reality. It’s never too late to write a happy ending. You own the power to make it happen. Say YES and let today be the first day of your new life in HD.
Want more details? Book a free info session! (or just a virtual tea and chat, if you prefer…)