I think I can safely say that all my life, a part of me felt I was destined for greater things. But another part of me kept stumbling. Regularly. Constantly. Always. I’d feel great and inspired, and then days or weeks later, I’d feel shitty and crappy, feeling that I was just a lost case. It was a constant struggle. There was always something not working: a job that often drained me, a relationship that made me feel unworthy, a city or country that just didn’t light me up… and I felt STUCK. Stuck in a life I didn’t like.
And it’s tricky, because it’s not like I was miserable… There WERE things working in my life, and even great ones!
At one point, I was living on what Mark Twain called Paradise island, I ran my own business, I lived next to the beach and had friends to hang out and have fun with… And I did. But there was something.. Something inside of me that just sucked up all the good vibes that came in. Like a bottomless pit.
And even when I took steps to change things, there was still something missing… Even when I moved country, changed jobs, got a new partner, that bottomless pit was still there, and I still got dragged down…
But then one day, things changed. I realised I had some responsibility in what was happening. I realised I had been complacent and that I myself had often fed the demons eating up my chances of being happy. And I got fucking tired of that.
I got tired of being scared: scared of being myself (because then people wouldn’t like me), scared of being judged (more than I already was), scared of being labelled as bad (as I had always had)…
FEAR had been consuming me to the point where there was just nothing left to consume. I guess that’s when my survival instinct kicked in.
“There comes a time when the excruciating pain of the past becomes so unbearable that you just can’t keep running away anymore. The faint hope of freedom is worth risking it all. Exhausted and breathless, heart pounding in your chest, you finally stop, and in the most powerfully graceful move, you swerve, turn around and face your Darkness. I am ready. I am not afraid. I am Light.” (Soul Superstar: Stories From My Sober Heart)
Facing my darkness was the best decision I’ve ever made. Because when you live in the Light, life becomes lighter….
Change didn’t happen overnight though. And to be honest, there were times when it sucked. BIG TIME. But where I am today is oh so worth it. My freedom is priceless. And that’s why I’ve made it my mission to help women experience it for themselves too: it’s the most beautiful gift you could give to your Self, and to the world…
I’ve created a safe space where I want to share my story and invite you to share yours. I want to read my book to you, and with each chapter, discuss the themes, the experiences, the feelings behind. I know my story is also yours. I know what I talk about, you’ve experienced to some extent. And that’s why I want to invite you in. Let’s bring our Light together!
Click here to join!
In my course, BYOB – Be Your Own Booze, I teach women to reclaim their Inner Power and transform their reality. It’s never too late to write a happy ending. You own the power to make it happen. Say YES and let today be the first day of your new life in HD.
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Or if you do have an idea but aren’t sure it’s viable – like, whether you can turn it into a whole book or not – let’s talk about it! C’mon! Book a call and let’s chat – it’s on the house!